How 2020 can be your best decade yet!
We are on the cusp of a new decade 2020 once seemed so distant and now it is just days away. The end of anything prompts us to remince about the past. We think of all the good and all the bad, sometimes we focus on just one side of that coin. But we also have the tendancy to think about where we could be in six months, or a year, or even five or ten years. But how do we use this natural phenomenon of looking back, projecting forward to really take the best from the past, make the biggest and best plans to suit the future we want. And most importantly, how do we start making a difference right now!
Remember – You Only Live Once! YOLO!
Looking back
Taking stock of what has been
When we start to take a look back at the last year or perhaps the last decade we’re filled with a mixture of emotions. There were the highs of the journey to get us to this point.
Perhaps you:
- Finished school,
- found that special someone,
- traveled somewhere incredible,
- or just had lots of precious moments with the ones we love that are irreplaceable.
Take some time to record your successes, your highs from the journey thus far. List as many things as you can think of. You may be surprised at how far you’ve come in recent times.
For more DustyDreamerHQ self-review tips read this post!
Also, on the flip side of this coin, some portions of the journey have been hard. You have been bumped and bruised along the way. You have probably experienced some kind of loss be that a loved one, or perhaps a job, a friendship that has ended, or a multitude of other unfortunate circumstances that we wished never had to be.
Now may also be a good time to just let all of that out onto a piece of paper. Acknowledge that you have had some tough times. You’ve been through a lot to get here!
If you want inspiration on how to let go of what’s holding you back? Read of our 3 part series – here.
So what do we do with all of this?
The thing with the past is there is actually nothing you can do to change it. No matter how hard you wish or try it will stay as it happened. So, the only thing we can do that is constructive and useful is to learn from it all!
Learning from the past
Learning from the past requires going back and reviewing the good, the bad, and the ugly with a purpose. Rather than just rehashing the past, or opening up old wounds this process is about growing. Almost every situation in life will teach us things when we go looking for the lessons. These are like buried treasure waiting to be found and what things we learn are numerous and varied.
In different circumstances we might learn things about ourselves or others. Because we all act differently in different environments. When the heat is on we may act one way. And when we’re on a nice relaxing vacation sipping Piña colada’s on the beach we will probably act a different way.
What can you learn?
Here are some ideas of what you might learn:
- How do we act under pressure?
- Are there any unhealthy behaviors, such as negative self-talk or anger issues that we can identify?
- Are we putting our best foot forward every day?
- Where do we lose motivation?
- Where/What are the roadblocks?
- If we have regrets – what are they? Why are they? How can we prevent these happening again?
- Compare your behavior: good vs bad times…
Compare your behavior in the good times and the bad
We can also compare how we do in the good times to the bad times. Perhaps in the good times we forget about those less fortunate than us, maybe we live it up more than we ought to, and perhaps if we were a little more thoughtful in how we acted, or how we spent our money we would be better off.
In the bad times your better qualities might shine forth. You may see things in yourself that make you proud of who you are that aren’t always there in the good times.
Decide what you like about your actions and do more of this
Now is your opportunity to compare and contrast who you are under those different circumstances. And while you go through this process you can determine which qualities you want to keep and develop and which ones you want to ditch.
Once you know what traits you think are worth keeping you are automatically aware of doing more like this. But the powerful thing is you can even consciously work on adding more of this to your life.
And whilst you have traits from your past that you may wish you didn’t you are you. And the only thing you can change is for now moving forward.
Read more about how to start from where you are… Here.
So, learn from those mistakes, and work on phasing out those elements of your character you can do with out. Again being aware of this helps you to put some active effort reducing these “undesirables” over time.
To do this it’s useful to keep track of the traits and where you’re at and what you’re aiming for in terms of increasing or decreasing their prevalence in your life.
Find out more about tracking the changes you want to make in your life – read this.
What would you do differently?
Another way you can learn from the past is to analyze your behavior in certain situations. By doing this you will be able to figure out how you might have reacted or acted differently and what the outcome of these changes would bring. This is so if you encounter this problem/challenge/situation in the future you have a game plan… You can act with more certainty and know that your moves are well thought out and considered in advance of the situation. This is especially helpful if you are short of time to make a decision. By already having thought through the possible outcomes and decided on the best course of action you will be able to make a clear and decisive move and be confident about your decision.
Projecting forward
Next in the thought process once you have gleaned learnings from your past often we instinctively turn to our hopes for the future. This may look different depending on where you are in your life and how much of direction you have. If you don’t know where you want to go, no worries, I was there once – I still am in some ways. But don’t let the future freak you out!
If you don’t have anything specific think generally – and we have a blog post that will help you come up with some general direction even if you don’t have a clue! Just check out this post.
Where do you see yourself?
So, what do you see yourself doing by certain points in your life? And in certain increments of time measured from a given starting point into the future?
Say in :
- 3 months,
- 6 months
- 1 year
- 5 years
- 10 years
- and/or if you prefer by an age milestone – 21, 30, 40, etc…
What are the things you see yourself accomplishing? Are there skills do you want to learn? And what kind of adventures do you want to go on? What activities will give you that sense of accomplishment and fulfillment when you look back next time you run through this process?
When you see where you’d like to be you may have a decent picture of what success in certain areas of your life looks like.
Make sure you write these down somewhere that you can come back to and review.
Some kind of goal setting
OK so why write all of this down? Well because we humans are rather forgetful of two things 1) all that we’ve accomplished and 2) where we want to go.
Sure you know where you want to go but when the going gets tough it’s easy to forget what you’re aiming for and why. So, write down what you want nd then go for it.
And you can even use the goal-setting technique of SMART goals to help you.
SMART is an acronym that stands for Specific, Measureable, Actionable, Reasonable or Realistic, and Timely.
Basically what this is saying, in a nutshell, is, make your goals attainable and clear in your mind so that you know you’ve accomplished them. The end is not ambiguous and wishy-washy.
You want to see the peak of that mountain and know why you’re putting in the training and feeling those aching muscles. The purpose is to get to the top by X date! Sounds simple enough…Right?! But in the moment things may feel very different.
Making the most of now
There is a balance to learning from the past and planning for the future. The reason why we do all of this reflecting and planning is so that we can make the most of the moments we have now!
It is true when people say – YOLO… you only live once. But what’s the point of all the living if you’re not being purposeful about it.
So, how do you make the most of now?
Life is all about living in the moment and making the best decisions minute by minute day by day. What’s going to be the best way to enjoy life, build toward the goals you have and make memories that last a lifetime will be different for each of us. The thing is you can have your cake and eat it too, you can enjoy the moment, YOLO your little heart out with purpose and confidence knowing that you won’t regret your actions.
Because once you’ve combed through the past and learned those lessons and decided on some kind of direction for the next workable period of your life you’ll be more aware of where you’re spending your time. And this awareness will help you to determine if you’re sitting on one end of the see-saw or balancing somewhere nicely in the center.
Of course some weeks you will do better than others and feel like you’re on top of the world all that you need to get done done and still having all the fun in the world. And other times you’ll feel swamped by the tsunami of life – in those times remember you’re doing your best and if you need some more inspiration – read this!
Build the life of your dreams
By looking back, projecting forward, and making the most of now you can make 2020 can be your best decade yet! You can build the life of your dreams, reminisce on the past and enjoy the many memories with fondness and you can YOLO to your heart’s content.
You can live with purpose and know that you are in control of your life and how you spend your time. And by using this process you can know who you are on the good days and the bad ones. And you’ll be able to work to be more of the person you want to look in the mirror and see every day.
Own who you are and enjoy the opportunities life presents itself as you continue on your journey through life into 2020 and beyond!